Too much trammels of convention when people die. [From Miyuku]

My loving mother-in-law died of cancer in late May when I was away on my business trip. It was a shame I couldn’t be here to see her off when she passed away, but I did have quality time with her when she was quite conscious about everything.

When you read the title, “Too much trammels of convention,” you may well relate yourself to our religious rituals. Yes, there were countless rituals I didn’t know but had to follow at the funeral. However, it was agreeable, because they all seemed so solemn and beautiful to see someone off to another stage.

However what made me puzzled and uncomfortable was to receive monetary gifts and give return gifts. Say if you’re a very close friend of a family, you give about 10,000 yen (equivalent to AU$128) at the funeral. To start with, this amount is not that small, anyway, and after about 50 days, there will be a religious event called “50 days anniversary,” in Shintoism. By then, you’ll need to prepare the gift which value is half as much as the money given. In this case, you have to find something around 5.000 yen for the return gift. I’m not trying to belittle the money giver, but it was a lot of work.

If you think of buying something worth about 5,000 yen for yourself, it may not be that difficult, but when there are more than 100 people you have to decide what is the proper thing to give, and it becomes a huge amount of work.

This is a big business for a department store here. A customer service at a department store came to explain how the system worked. They have all different kinds of goods that cover all ranges from small amount to a large amount of money given. They will prepare thank you cards and make an address list for you. They will give you advice what to write on the card and how the gift should be wrapped in a proper way. I was so amazed there were so many things to follow, even after the funeral.
 
If I had time to choose something they would like, it would be nice and I would be able to show appreciation, but what we did was to choose from the special catalogue for the occasion, and just picked out the things that matched the price.

We just finished this huge task, and now think back, what is the point of doing this? Can we just give half the money and ask for no return gift?  Money giving was to support the family to hold the nice funeral for the dead.  Not to support the family’s everyday living nor the sales of a department store.

I know there are wonderful traditions we want to follow for years to come, but I’m not sure if this is one of them.
 

 Win XP service pack 2 has now ended as has support for Win 2000.
 
The complex security systems we live with today that protect us from malicious Internet attacks have their roots in these two older operating systems.

Windows XP, arguably Microsoft's most popular operating system, gained many of its most important security features from the lessons learned by Microsoft as it patched Windows 2000.
You'll no longer receive Windows 2000 security patches from Microsoft. So if you're running this OS, consider isolating it from the Internet.
 
All Windows XP SP2 users need to move up to Service Pack 3 immediately.

Vista users should have Service pack 2 installed.

 We've got a couple of chooks in the front yard (it's called the front yard 'cos that's the way the house faces - north - faces away from the access road - south - sort of back to front but, hey...). 

The "girls" are now producing an egg a day between them, just enough for the missus and me. Contrary to "best practice" medico advice I tend to eat eggs every second day - love 'em. My general preference is fried - the missus likes them poached. My real preference is scrambled eggs but I'm also the dishwasher in our household and scrambled eggs usually makes for a lot of scrubbing of the pan.

Anyways, the chooks are quite tame; one likes a scratch between the wings when we enter their yard. Never happened before, but the current pair are very domesticated. So I talk to them a bit - like talking to babies - if anyone overheard would be rather embarrassing...My theory is that talking to them keeps them satisfied - and a satisfied chook is a happy chook - and happy chooks lay eggs.

We had plans for a few more chooks but at present we're happy with just the two. They also keep the daughter's Kelpie amused (well, occupied at least) Round and round the chook yard she runs, satisfying her genetic urge to round things up. Fortunately the "front" yard is big enough to give her space to run.

It's not just about the eggs with the chooks - we sit on our verandah and watch them wander around their yard. So it keeps us occupied as well - adds a bit of rural ambience to the place.

Counting my blessings - being able to keep chooks must be in the top ten!

Posted by Miyuku

In my previous posting I talked a little about this place, so let me now tell you about the book called, "Tono Monogatari," which translates as, "The Legends of Tono." I had the privilege to meet and receive a lecture on the book by its English translator, Dr. Donald Morse. I had translated a Japanese cultural book before, so I shared the same difficulties in translating different languages.

The book, however, is very well translated in its nuances, plus has a lot of explanations. It is a collection of being-told stories, which are rather legends. There exist many goblins, monsters and imaginary creatures in the story. It is like a Japanese version of Grimm’s Fairy Tales. The author, Kunio Yanagita, collected the stories he heard from Kizen Sasaki, who lived in Tono at the time. The village was in the mountainous area and life there wasn’t as easy as back in the old days, so the stories vividly portray this harsh life.

One of the 119 stories goes like this:
A long time ago, there was a goddess who took her three daughters to a certain area in the evening and told them she would give the best mountain to the one who had the finest dream that night.
During the night, the youngest sister saw the beautiful lotus flower float down from heaven and rest on her eldest sister’s chest. She secretly took the flower and put it in her own chest and went back to sleep. So, the youngest sister got the best mountain, called Hayachine, and her older sisters got the mountains called Rokkoushi and Ishigami. These young goddesses lived on their own mountains and ruled over them. Women in Tono are told not to climb the mountains for they make the goddesses jealous.

The story ends there, and there is no moral teaching, or capper in it. I felt uneasy with the story at first because the cunning, youngest daughter gets the best mountain. But it’s up to the listeners how they understand or enjoy the story. The story only tells the facts.

I truly enjoyed my two-day trip to Tono, and I have a feeling I will come back to this unique place before too long. Till then, I will leave my heart in Tono. Anyone wish to join me?

If you're interested you can order and English version of the book at Amazon.com.  (Sorry, but I couldn't find one at Amazon.au)  Please read it as the reviews there are worth reading.
 

It is on my wish list, that we attract and interact with seniors from countries where English is not their first language.

An exchange of views in our forums between people of common heritage is fine and comfortable, but what do seniors in India, Russia, China, Brazil, Iran and more, think about what we have to say?

What is important to them? Are we all sisters and brothers under the skin, or are there fundamental differences in our approach to life and ageing?

What do you think?

If you recognise that reference, lucky you.  If not, look up Granny Weatherwax.

I am in London with my wife, heading for Italy in a day or so, glorying in the courteous way EU countries allow a range of concessions for seniors, though it looks as though the blind sheep who have taken control of Britain may well change that soon.

Still, while the going is good, entry to museums and galleries is free, and the Brits come pouring in, as do the many, many foreigners who are to be found here.  Once the Tories make their cuts, charges will come in, the crowds will stop coming and the tourist dollars, euros and pounds will stop flowing.

And that is why we are disporting ourselves in fun places and why I am not blogging here.  My travel blog is at http://mcmanly.livejournal.com/ where you can read of our adventures and occasional trials.

Britain, by the way, is suffering its worst drought since 1929, its second-worst in the last century.  On the Hebridean island off Ulva, just off Mull, the primary school's well has driest up, and on Mull, the distillery may soon have to stop production.

There won't be a whisky drought like the one that inspired Compton Mackenzie's 'Whisky Galore', but a break in production will have awful knock-on effects in a small island economy.

Thought for the day: if Britain had pursued an honest policy of transporting thieves and rogues, Australia would be knee-deep in barons, earls, dukes and their progeny, and Britain would be a republic.

Tono- the home of the Legends of Tono  (Part one)

From Miyuku

I’m now in Tono in Iwate prefecture which is about 500 km north-east of Tokyo. This place is well known for the charm of its legends that have been story-told in the area.

I knew about the place and had read or heard of some of the stories before, but I had never been here.  It has always been on my list of places to visit.  

Here I am writing this in a nice little hotel called Hotel Aeria, which is only a five minute walk from the very small “Tono” station.

I took a Shinkansen from Tokyo station to Shinhanamaki. It took about two and a half hours, and then I got on a local train which gave us a nice view of rice fields and the country sides.  

Not many foreigners know about this place yet, but if I were a traveler, I’d prefer places like this one where I can feel and smell the life of the local people. The Tono area itself is not that small, but the town of Tono is pretty compact in its size and everyone knows everyone else here. I was with a lady from the chamber of commerce yesterday, and she would greet people walking on the streets of Tono so many times. People seemed so friendly here.

I got up at 4 this morning, took a shower, and went for a morning walk, photographing the village. There was a morning market which sells fresh vegetables and flowers near the station. I wished I could bring back some!  Actually I could, I guess, if I didn’t have any other heavy things to carry.  

On the way back to my hotel, there was a Tofu shop.  A very friendly looking old man was sitting in front of the shop, at 5 a.m. I smiled and asked for a soy milk. It was a very tasty, very “soy” milk. What I mean is, it was just a pure soy milk made from good kinds of soybeans and pure water. He asked me where I was from, so I said I was from Tokyo. Then he asked me which part of Tokyo I was from, so I said I was from Nakano. Then he started to tell me about his family and relatives living in Tokyo. During our brief visit, he had already greeted two people, and it was even before 6 a.m.  ha-ha!  Then he saw someone he had knew for a long time, so he started talking to him. I quietly left with a little good-bye.  

This kind of little visits makes my trip even more colorful, and I just fell in love with this place!  
 

 After many years working with Windows PCs I have just added a Mac Book to my equipment inventory.

Actually my first personal computer was an Apple IIc but that's ancient history now.

Why the move to MacBook? Various reasons...I find I am doing a lot more graphics and visual work - drawing maps, editing photographs, making small movies; and Apple is supposed to be the best for that sort of work.

Curiosity also played a part - just what is the difference between Windows machines and Apples.

And of course the interface. When Apple introduced the iPhone I was struck by the quality of the user interface. I determined that I would judge all my website navigation by the benchmark of Apple simplicity. It's been a struggle achieving this using my Windows toolkit and am hoping the Apple platform will add that extra bit of encouragement to achieve goodness in interface design.

There's a lot to learn, and new shortcuts to learn. So far so good. It was slightly painful setting up again on the MacBook - e-mail addresses, e-mail accounts, etc. Also finding open-source graphics tools. But I have found them and it's all done now. And there was always a way to convert address books - even if an apple expert could probably have done it in a tenth of the time I took. So not as painful as I expected. Just takes time and patience.

And I was blown away by the plug and play for my printer - just plugged it in and away it went - no searching for drivers disks, etc. It just worked!

The browser is fast. The e-mail client is straightforward to use. And I can read files copied from my Windows PC.

So far, so good.

I am just thinking aloud really, but I have always wondered????

Being a well adjusted nearly 62 year old woman I have spent the majority of my life without a partner.  I am not sure why this is, - maybe I am a difficult person to get on with - maybe I am too fussy - maybe I have never met the right person.  

People seem to like me well enough, I have always had a great interest in people and people seem to warm to me easily and that is because I have always been a better listener than a talker.  I am empathetic and considerate to others.  So I don't think that that I am difficult to get on with.   My man radar is a little unusual because I have never been interested in the ultra good looking one - I just know what has attracted me and it has was that indifinable 'something.'  In my relationships I thought I had met the 'right one.'  Unfortunately that was not to be the case.  However in saying that, they were extremely important parts of my life, and at the time I came into their lives for a reason and I theirs. 

I know I am a little short tempered and dismissive at times, usually when I am preoccupied with something - but aren't we all like that??  Maybe I am just a big pain in the bum - I would love to know.   What an interesting exercise that would be.

Actually I quite enjoy being on my own and  maybe therein lies the problem.  I enjoy the freedom to do as I please without having to worry about someone else.  If I want to I eat I do, if I want to have a rest I do, if I want to go and cook tea for my children I do, if I just want to sit and read a book I can, if I want to go on a holiday I can.  Every day I am busy and if I do have a day on my own I treasure every minute.

But there is a part of me that feels alone.  Why?